Final Assignment: Crafting an Effective Writer Topic #2

Nyselxcin-Okanagan Language

Crafting an Effective Writer Topic #2: Identify and describe a favourite activity or interest and provide at least 4 reasons why this activity or interest holds your attention and/or is enjoyable to you.

                               Nyselxcin is a language being revived from the brink of extinction, by the very dedicated language keepers of our valley. Our culture, language and traditional ways of the First Nations people are slowly being driven into extinction because of generational problems and racism. The traditional language keepers of many nations were ripped from homes and beaten into submission via the residential school system. The Nyselxcin language was illegal to use for the First Nations people. This explains why so many First Nations languages were drowned out never to be heard again. In my valley, we have dedicated, motivated and amazing men and women that work tiresly so individuals like me can hear, learn and speak the language of our people, and to gift on the traditions to future generations. These same language keepers are showcasing and illuminating respect for our people, for ourselves, for our culture, for our language, and for our traditions. I am proud to say that I am currently learning my traditional native language. I is a difficult and rewarding language that gives me the greatest joy to be sharing with my children. The spoken sounds and the written words are absolutely fascinating.  I am proud to say that I am learning from amazing elders in my community. To ensure generational, existence of our traditional language, we must first start with, a moment, a step and the spoken the word.
Way’ lim limt! Goodbye, Thank You!

Whats in a language Pt 3

Whats in a Language….

 

Its not how we speak!  Sometimes its in the feeling behind the words. Ever talk to an Elder and listened to their stories….the way their eyes light up, or their voices get louder or softer to really emphasize their point.  The way the hand gestures are? If you have not had the pleasure, you should try it sometimes. I mean really listen, open your heart, your mind and your ears.  Watch, what happens is purely a miracle to behold. Treasure that moment , for all too quick time with our Elders is fleeting and fading….and whom will be there to share the stories, the wisdom, the knowledge of an entire life lived to the fullest?

When I was a little girl, I had a Papa, he wore a cowboy hat faithfully everyday (even when he napped!) He had cowboy boots on and the jeans with suspenders. He was magnificently tall, he hung the moon and the stars in my little grandbabies eyes. I sat at his feet while he played his guitar and harmonica(which was attached to the top of his guitar) and sang. I still remember the sound of his voice, and the smell of the room and the feel of the songs. This is how his legacy lives on in me. I learned to play the guitar. I learned to sing. I knew that what ever I learned I wanted to share with my children.

Well, this past year has been a whirl wind of learning, frustrations, hurt feelings and Lord knows….anger!

I was so excited because this year an amazing Elder and a good friend of mine were teaming up to do a preschool language program. (Because we homeschool this meant that myself, my 8 yr old, my 3 yr old and 1 yr old would be participating) Also on Mondays and Tuesdays in the Fall was Language class and guess what my husband attended them with us!

I was sooo excited to start. First, I had to get a Statutory Declaration signed my my biological mom. You see I was starting all of the paper work to get my Status. The little white card that tells you what band you belong to, and that says Hey you are Native! Yuppers here we go!

She refused to sign it, she needed to sign it because my dad was never placed on my birth certificate. It was an emotionally draining situation that blew up my a thousand percent each moment. A drama that could surpass any on television.  Albeit, she has her own personal reasoning, it was hard to walk through and harder because it left a lot of questions of the paternity and if the man I have know as my dad (for 28years) was my dad. It was a very hard, emotional situation. God, was my focus because without my faith in Him and what was to be would be…..I might have had some other things that happened.  At times, the hurt would spill into an anger that consumed my heart, it made me want to lash out at her. It made me so tired, drained, it made me feel like I belonged nowhere. God gently kept telling me that I was I was His daughter and He had it in His Will.

Now, let me tell you. Although, I knew for better or worse God had His ways and reasons……this sent me for a hard hit. I felt lost, looking at my dad, at my family members, the resemblance’s I had once seen so clearly were hazy. Like it was murky water that I couldn’t quite see the same as the clear crystal blue they were before.  I was afraid, afraid that a man I grew up with, lived with , fought with, respected and loved, a man that I so knew was my dad, our tempers, how we talk, how much we talk! All of these things were in question. I had been living in our sweet gorgeous valley, for two years! Two years pouring into our language, learning our culture, meeting cousins, auntys, uncles, friends.  Don’t get me wrong, it was not wasted time. It was cherished moments, and loved moments. But if I was a LSIB what was I?

I also, started having weird memories flooding over me, dreams that felt soo real. Memories I had long since forgotten and pushed aside. I had a very hard growing up. There  were good times but a lot of scary, angry hateful, spiteful moments. These were consuming my sleep.

My husband and I talked about it, prayed about it and decided to lay to rest. We got a DNA test. Now just so anyone else out there knows these tests are not cheap. It cost us $700 just for a scrape of the inside of my cheek and my dads. Yes, I know there is a lot involved with this process but it cost us a lot of money. It was worth it. To know for sure that my dad is my dad! It gave me clarity and although it didn’t stop the emotional rollercoaster I had been riding it did give closure to a question that he had kept locked away in his heart for all these years as well!

Now for applying to become a First Nations Status Card holder……ugh and sigh and allot of praying! They tell us, that the DNA is not good enough! That I must have my birth certificate changed over to have my dad added.  So we think sweet simple I have my dna test this should be a breeze…think again! Stats Can will only change the Live Birth Registration to add my dad if my mother signs the documentation. Which, she refused to sign anything! So we hired a lawyer (just to let you know, no we are not made of money but we felt that this was an investment in our family!) so we buckled down and didn’t spend money on anything that we didn’t 100% need! We had been blessed so that it wasn’t such a harsh burden! The lawyers says that INAC cannot do that. They cannot legally require a birth certificate, that a DNA test is admissible as one in the same with my birth certificate.  So, we called to see if we could go around all of this, turns out we can pay to go to the court house and see a judge explain situation and prove our case and have him stamp the birth certificate…..we don’t have money for that. We have three children at that time and really couldn’t do it. So we researched and talked to the lawyer. For all legalities the INAC cannot legally refuse the dna test. So we submitted anyways!

Then the waiting game….

During this waiting, we had the priviledge of learning our language! I learned from an Elder that sometimes its ok to not have a regular school type setting. My 3 yr old son would not sit in circle and just wanted to play. This beautiful woman told me to let him….boy oh boy it took a lot for me to do that! And you know what she was right….he learned more language from osmosis than anything! It made my heart sing! My Elder is a beautiful woman, I enjoyed sitting on the floor and listening to her teach and gleaning and learning! I learned more than a language, more than a culture I learned a love for people and a love for my life. I believed God gifted her to me at the right exact moment.

My dear friend, she is an amazing teacher. She helped me learn to calm down, to soak it in and to let things happen. She has six children all under the age of 14. She is a super hero mom. She worked along side of this beautiful Elder and I tell ya I was gifted an education of language and an education of motherhood, compassion, love and determination. This education is far more precious than anything I have ever learned in school! For you see my dear friend, although I know she is a closet superhero, she is a normal mom, good days, bad days amazing days! I have been blessed to get to know  her and learn from her. All at a time where I felt I was a failure in so many ways! God gifted me amazing women, mothers, grandmothers….friends and He knew that I needed them.

 

I also was gifted the opportunity to learn how to make traditional ribbon shirts, moccassins, and yarn bags for berry picking! We had so much fun! We forged friendships with other moms, and I tell ya nothing surpasses the laughs, the smiles and the amazing time we all had!

For you see a language is nothing without the people in which speak it. A people is not really a people without the love, laughter, faith, confidence, strength of who they are!

I am a born again Christian, I love my faith!

I am a Lower Similikamean Native woman! I love where I came from!

 

I will teach my children about God, about Christ and along side it all I will teach them of their heritage, language, culture! I will teach them to love others, to serve others, to be kind and to always always help when you can. No matter who the people are! For God called us to love one another, not just those you think deserve it! He called us to love one another and to serve in love! Forever my children will learn from example and from what we do.

 

Go listen to your Elders, hear with your heart, visualize the story. Fall in love!

Another post, will be my status situation for now, learn your heritage, learn your language! Learn Learn Learn!

Praying that this post encouraged!

Stacey Homemaker~

Whats in a Language......Whats in my own.....Part 3

Good Afternoon, Photography courtesy of Shelly Boyd

 



 Good Afternoon,
Praying that today is filling your heart with joy and gratefulness that we are almost into the summer!

We left off with my failure of my first Nyselxcin class....and if you remember correctly I learned quite a bit from and it was the harder class to begin with! :)

In January, my eldest daughter and I began Nyselxcin Naqs which is the beginner course for our language. I loved this class. Now by no means was this class easier. LOL! This language has a lot of guttural sounds, clicking, even the way you breathe is a specific sound when that sound comes out.

I am telling you this was harder to learn than singing for me. The joy I received from learning our language is indescribable. I felt that I fit in, I was welcomed, I belonged and in time I could really be good at it.

At this point I am now feeling not the overwhelmed anxieties of who I was because a piece of my heritage was molding with in my heart. This class was being taught by a wonderful woman, whom believes that anyone wanting to learn should be encouraged and helped as much as you can. Both her and our elder teacher are the most amazing women. I have to say I have never met two woman work so hard for something, with such passion and strength and love. These two taught me so much about myself and about where I came from. The knowledge is priceless and I can never repay them for the price would be far to high. They are worth so much to me.

 

You see our language was going extinct and from the efforts of a few (but growing now) people they are growing, thriving and teaching. I am so proud of all of the hours or effort behind the scenes that go un noted, un documented. The Hours the amazing ppl put in writing proposals, record audio, writing booklets for our amazing children, songs, curriculum, stories......I know from personal experience how much they work. I have to say each one of them deserves a medal for how much they do!

This class we  as an entire class were able to get to lesson 10 before the time was up. And this class I passed!

By this time I was so blessed with many friends and family. I was blessed with my children learning this gorgeous language that comes from our heritage.

 

 

We learned greetings, numbers, food, family tree, and so much more. It made me want to become bilingual and teach my other children as well. So all that summer we practiced until even my 3 and 1 year old understood the words from the lessons 1-10 at least to hear and understand.

 

 

At this time I was trying to obtain my status.....because my parents were so young when I was born there were a lot of misunderstandings yuppers some arguments and what have you, so when I was little I did not receive my status.

 

When I was in high school because alot of stressful situations and fighting occurred again I was unable to get my status.

 

 

When I was born my father was never added to my birth certificate. Which poses a problem when I am older and trying to get my status.

 

As it stands INAC requires that your birth certificate says who the father is. This is just to apply for your status.

 

Because of difficult situations with my mother this was a stressful, hurtful, and extrememly emotional painful process to go through.

Also, I live in the city in which my parents were when they got pregnant with me and where a lot of their growing  up was!

 

So you can imagine stories and rumours and so much else! It was very scary and even some things from my mother made me question whether my dad was my dad.....

 

 

It was an extremely traumatic situation with a fair amount of stress. My beautiful, thoughtful, caring loving husband, God and good friends and family really saw me through it!

 

We got the paternity test and it came back 99.999% my dad was mine!!!!!!!!!!!:) :) 

The relief was indescribable. It was wonderous! Unfortunatley,INAC said they needed my birth certificate changed...and wouldn't you know it! In order for my bc. to be changed my birth mother had to sign the live birth registration for it to be changed......

A door closed, slammed shut frustration, agony, anger my resolve was now slowly falling. Seeking God for strength, endurance and perseverance.

God sent me my husbands love, my husbands grace for my emotions, my husbands arms to hold me through the tears, my husbands ears to listen to the crying, the anger, the disappointment the fear and my husbands amazing faith in God our Creator to hold me steadfast and on the path!

God gave me my amazing Husband!

Well, for today I feel that will be enough. I have talked your eyes off lots probably.
Until next post,
may you be blessed today and may today you equally be a blessing to others.
Stacey Homemaker~

Photography by Shelly Boyd,
www.salishschoolofspokane.org
www.interiorsalish.com

Whats in a Language....Whats in My own......Part 1

Yes, I am Beautiful!
Yes, I am Hardwarking!
Yes, I am a mother!

Welcome to my journey to discovery a most beautiful language. My own. Not only how I am learning the beautiful language of Nyselxcin but also how I am learning my journey of who I am. Who I am as a Wife, Mother, Daughter…Who I am in Christ. Who I am in LIFE! Welcome and lets journey together.

What  is in a language? Does the language you speak dictate your life or how you think? Or wait a minute does it affect how you perceive the everyday things……?

What a concept. I grew up with a Caucasian family. A mother and a step father (or mother’s boyfriend ) for half of my childhood. The other half I spent living with a First Nations Father and a Caucasian (step mother or girlfriend).

I was taught English and French(although I only went to grade 8 French…it was not my favorite subject at all!) In grade nine, I moved in with my dad and I decided that I wanted to try German.

Two years prior I found out that I in fact was a First Nations child…

Now you have to understand, why this was such a shocker….I grew up in a suburban neighborhood predominately Caucasian people. The only children that were the same color as my skin where either African American, and or of Indian descent (ancestory mainly from India). So my skin was closest to the African American skin so I adopted the heritage and felt quite strongly about it! Plus, at the age of twelve the cable network had a ton of really cool shows that were all African American teens or young adults. So for me that worked. J

I never once thought to ask my dad, when I saw him or even ask my mother what or who I was. I chose to assume an identity cause it is what I liked.

I studied German for three years. I loved this language so much and I caught on so well that my thoughts were in German….even the bad words came out predominately German. LOL

Although for most of my life, I was confused what or who I was. During High school I moved to a town that had a large population of First Nations peoples. It was here that I learned of a difference in culture and dance and music. Although I never ever knew that the people in which I came from had there very own language.

I struggled to fit in. For you see, I am not a status First Nation Person. I am a NON Status….In my experiences in my life I find sometimes this is the worst part of learning who I am… because sometimes it feels like I am not fully….real……

While growing up sometimes because I didn’t have that Card….you know the white card that has your picture on it. The one that proudly states the family name, proudly displaying the Band to which you belong…….When you don’t have this card you are a limbo person….The Caucasian people see you as different…and the First Nations people as not full blood, not completely not the same…NOT REAL!

Now don’t get me wrong not all Caucasians feel this way and not all First Nations feel this way, this is only from my personal experiences.

Also, please do not miss understand me.  I know that my identity does not come in a perfect little white card or some silly piece of paper. And to be perfectly honest I am very content with my life and that God is what defines me. And God is the one leading through my blessed life.

With that said, its like there’s a piece of me that is a little not there..it is missing in some way……

I moved to the Valley in which my people are from. I moved back to the Valley in which not long prior my dad was the Chief of our Band. I moved back in a flurry of very stressful and amazing events. I moved back….to find that the people in which I wondered about my entire life. The people in which participated in all of these events and things that I had read about in books, seen a very small portion in real life. My husband I moved here.

Now first of all, I am a born again Christian with a very conservative lifestyle now. I and our family have different ways we do things. (which will come in another post). By all standards, most think we are weird and odd. For most things people tend to think we go overboard for Christ. I don’t mind. I say let them think it…most days…some days I want people to just understand.

 

Second of all, not a lot of people knew that I existed. No one’s fault just never came up. So for the first year of living in this beautiful Valley it was hard for me to find out that most people here (relatives and long-term friends of family) had no idea that I was who I was….

 

Thirdly, I am in an inter-racial marriage. My wonderful, loving, amazing husband…he is as white as they come. No joke lol! Now you may not think that it should matter…you know this day and age. But you would be surprised and how much it does matter.

 

Now I am not saint, I am not perfect. Prior to my life now, I used to do a lot of bad stuff. I never had an easy life. I have never always chosen the right path in which to go. I have been plagued with all the stuff most others are plagued with. I have always had not the best health. I struggled severely with depression when I was younger. With Self Esteem issues. With alcoholism…..the list can go on. I am a born again Christian and made new my life with hard work, dedication, perseverance and the Lord guiding me and giving me the strength to do it all.

So you ask what does all that have to do with language?

Ever felt like your not like everyone else?

Ever felt like there is something about you that doesn’t mesh like everyone else?

Ever felt your alone and don’t belong…like no is like you?

Ever felt like pieces of your identity are missing and you don’t know what to do?

Your language, how you speak it, how you think it, how you teach it to your children…..This truly shapes who you are. Did you know that the language in which you speak can dictate your day…

 

Negative self talk words and to others

Negative tones spoken to children, spouses and family

Negative highlights in your facial expression when a word comes out of your mouth

Positive word self talk and to others

Positive tones spoken to children, spouses and family

Positive highlights in your facial expression when a word comes out of your mouth

A single words said a hundred different ways can trigger a memory, an emotion and a reaction in your mind, body and soul like you would never ever realize until you test out the theory.

Think about it….English is taught from infancy and beyond….

With songs and stories.

With cartoons and motions.

With emotions, facial expressions.

Through history and tradition.

Each language comes with a built in life of culture and ideals.

If you are surrounding yourself with negative usage of words what do you think your face will show. How do you think your behavior will be different?

Do you think it affects much? I do….

Did you know that how you say your words also can filter down to how you walk and how your facial expressions are…..Go to a high school anyday, listen to the teenagers speak and watch how each group (distinguished first by how they talk) stands, how their faces change with each word, their body languages, and even how they right comes right from the fundamentals of speech.

You will notice that when I write. I talk fast, I think fast and I like it when all things mold together the same. I jump sometimes in my thoughts, which filters down to how I talk and write.

Speaking of Which pretty sure this is going on to long…I will stop here. Tomorrow lets really get into the meat and potatoes of me and this language and how it is coming for me…

Thank you for reading, I pray that it made sense and gave you some insight to me.

May you be blessed and equally so may  you be a blessing to others!

Stacey Homemaker~