Ever wonder why your life is the way it is? Have you ever
thought, “wow, is this really my life?” I am sitting here and realize how
amazing and wonderful my life truly is.
Not that I am wealthy in money. Not that I own a big fancy
house or that I have a brand new car. Not that I have nails done and perfect
hair…..
I am thinking about all of the lessons that I have been
shown, the lessons that happen upon me by accident, and the lessons that I had
to be drug through kicking and screaming.
I am a proud mama of three amazing children, and pregnant
with our fourth child. I almost died with both of our first two children and by
all medical means I should not have made it through either one.
Our third child was God’s gift to me. It was His amazing
love, strength and encouragement and gift for trusting in Him even when I was
so scared to have another child after the first two.
This lesson is one of my greatest of all to learn. I will
not be given more that I can bare. I will not be tested without the teacher
knowingly testing my true abilities and not just my thought abilities.
You know
those abilities that we ourselves limit our own selves. We somehow get stuck in
rut, believing that our strength only comes from us ourselves, pushing,
running, working, forging on and somehow we wonder why we are so tired. We
wonder why we are so stressed. We wonder why it seems that no matter what we
can never get ahead. Key words: Why and
I’s.
It is in all of my achievements that I look back on now….I
was leaning on how much I could accomplish. I was banking on how much I could
handle. I was swimming in a sea of why’s and how’s and oh no’s…
In a single moment, for the first time an un medicated
labour, a healthy labour……oh my word the pain that I hadn’t the pleasure of
being introduced the first two times around. The single moment where the rubber
met the road….where I in my own strength, in my own body, in my own mind knew I
couldn’t do it. I wanted those drugs. I wasn’t strong enough. I was not able. I
was not willing anymore…and in that instant it was like God himself holding me
and urging me and took over and said, “It is then in which I carried you!” “You
got this” I gave birth to our third child, a daughter. No drugs and absolutely
gorgeous! In the moments I knew that God gave me the gift of endurance,
strength and perseverance and never ever left me for a moment.
Now…married for almost five years, we own and operate our
own business, I homeschool our children and love our life. But there are still
those moments of utter chaos, trials and tribulations….and His love remains. In
the business, in the stress, in the OMW moments, in the disrepair, in the
moments of pure joy, in the amazing moments of kisses, hugs and I love you’s….and
all the mess, all the chaos….I know not ever will He leave me and not ever will
I be given more that I can bare.
My husband and I were watching one of Pastor Danny Castle’s
sermons and he read out this amazing poem. In so many times this poem showcases
how I feel and how I want to parent. I want to share it with you.
The Race.
Whenever I start to
hang my head in front of failures face,
My downward fall is
broken by the memory of a race.
A children’s race,
young boys, young men; how I remember well,
Excitement sure, but
also fear, it wasn’t hard to tell.
They all lined up so
full of hope, each thought to win that race,
Or tie for first, or
if not that, at least take second place.
Their parents watched
from off the side, each cheering for their son,
And each boy hope to
show his folks that he would be the one.
The whistle blew and
off they flew, like chariots of fire,
To win, to be the
hero there, was each young boy’s desire.
One boy in
particular, whose dad was in the crowd, was running in the lead
And though, “My dad
will be so proud.” But as he speeded down the field and
Crossed a shallow
dip, the little boy thought he’d win, lost his step and slipped.
Trying hard to catch
himself, his arms flew everyplace, and midst the laughter
Of the crowd he fell
flat on his face. As he fell, his hope fell too; he couldn’t win
It now. Humiliated,
he just wished to disappear somehow.
But as he fell his
dad stood up and showed his anxious face, which to the boy so
Clearly said, “Get up
and win that race!” He quickly rose, no damage done, behind a
Bit that’s all, and
ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall.
So anxious to restore
himself, to catch up and to win,
His mind went faster
than his legs. He slipped and fell again. He wished that he had quit
Before with only one
disgrace. “I’m hopeless as a runner now, I shouldn’t try to race.”
But through the
laughing crowd he searched and found his father’s face with a steady look
That said again, “Get
up and win that race!” So he jumped up to try again, ten yards behind
The last. “If I’m to
gain those yards,” he thought, “I’ve to run real fast!”
Exceeding everything
he had, he regained eight, then ten….
But trying hard to
catch the lead, he slipped and fell again. Defeat! He lay there silently. A
tear
Dropped from his eye.
“There’s no sense running anymore! Three strikes I’m out! Why try? I’ve lost,
so what’s the use?” he thought. “I’ll live with my disgrace.”
But then he thought
about his dad, who soon he’d have to face. “Get up,” an echo sounded low,
“You haven’t lost at
all, for all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall. Get up!” the
echo urged him on, “Get up and take your place! You were not meant for failure
here!
Get up and win that race!” So, up he rose to run once more, refusing to
forfeit, and he resolved that win or lose, at least he wouldn’t quit. So far
behind the others now, the most he’d ever been, still he gave it his all he had
and ran like he could win.
Three times he’d fallen stumbling, three times he
rose again.
Too far behind to
hope to win, he still ran to the end. They cheered another boy who crossed the
line and won first place, head high and proud and happy—no falling, no
disgrace.
But, when the fallen
youngster crossed the line, in the last place, the crowd gave him a greater
cheer for finishing the race. And even though he came in last with head bowed
low, unproud, you would have though he’d won the race, to listen to the crowd.
And to his dad he sadly said, “I didn’t do so well.” “To me, you won,” his
father said. “You rose each time you fell.”
And now when things
seem dark and bleak and difficult to face, the memory of that little boy helps
me in my own race. For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and
all. And all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
And when depression
and despair shout loudly in my face, another voice within me says, “Get up and
win that race!”
~attributed to Dr. D.H. “Dee” Groberg
My prayer is that you are encouraged today. Not one of us is
perfect. We do not need to win the race in the manner we think. You are amazing
and you need to rise each time you fall. That is the greatest accomplishment
through it all. Praying you have an amazing day.
Stacey Homemaker.
